5th May 2023

If you've been here before, welcome back to lovergirls.net! If you haven't... welcome anyways!! It's taken me approximately 3 months to find the time to revamp my site. School's been really, really busy and, to be honest, I am barely getting by. I am, however, still doing a lot better than what 15-year-old me would have expected.

A little update on my extra-curricular activities: I'm running for leadership positions in both my CCA's but I have very little confidence in my abilities to clinch a role. I've also taken on a long-term volunteering committment, which I've been enjoying thus far! Helping little kids improve is such a heart-warming experience. Unfortunately, my committments have a tendency to overlap and I'm not sure how well I would be able to handle them in the coming months. Oh well, all the best to me I guess!

I've been trying to pick up some graphic design skills and I'd like to think that I have a natural flare for it. My goal is to design a full deck of playing cards by the end of next year but that's quite a lofty goal. I'm also planning to use my time during the year-end holidays to learn blender!! I'll post a few of my attempts on here when I have the time.

Gosh, okay, this post has just been life updates so far, but I don't really have anything else to talk about. I'll end it here I guess, but I'll probably be back in two weeks with a much, much longer post. And a few more pieces in the writing gallery (hopefully). Thanks for reading and take care!! Mwah <3

~ nyx!!

20th Febuary 2023

I'm writing this in the middle of class, a month after school has officially begun for me. I've only recently gotten over a particularly nasty bout of the flu and I've developed a newfound appreciation for being able to talk without being constantly interrupted by the need to cough.

It's horribly cold in my classroom, but I've elected to leave my cardigen at home today because of how heavy it is. The worksheets and notes we have received over the past week or so have been insanely heavy (and expensive). I've filled a total of 2 files with them alone. I am currently still waiting for my application for a locker to be approved. I can't wait to be able to dump my online shopping (and my notes) there after every haul.

On the topic of school, applications for extra-curriculars have been really stressful. It's hilarious how I've attended more interviews in the past few days than I have over the past 4 years of my school life. ...I'm deathly afraid of interviews. I'm hoping that I'll be accepted into everything I've applied for but that is prehaps too wishful. I have to submit a short story for a club I want to join, I'll upload it here (or an extended version) after I'm done with it.

My life pretty much revolves entirely around school... I wish I had a slightly more interesting update but this will have to do. Goodbye!

Edit: A little update! I made it into all the extra-curriculars I wanted (what a relief). Here's the (terrible) short story I submitted (unedited, unbeta'ed, etc. etc.):

it’s always sunny outside

It’s dark, stormy and all-around gloomy where I live. The clouds hang overhead, never leaving. The street lamps flicker constantly and the pavements glisten in the rain. No one steps foot outside, not to mow the lawn, not to weed their gardens, not to repaint the rusty gates. I can see the overgrown jungles sprawling across our street from the window by my bedside.

I barely remember my life before I had been moved here. At night, I toss and turn in my bed, dreaming of colourful festivities and strange machinery I wish I knew more about. During the day, I stare out of my window at the house across the road and wonder if they’re all like me, trapped in a house they don’t know, strapped down to a bed frame and a thin mattress.

I’d lost all feeling in my arms days, weeks, months ago. They’ve turned a lovely shade of blue-black to match the leather cuffs that hold me down. I can’t see my legs from where I’ve been laid to rest, but I assume they’ve met the same fate. There’s a stinging numbness where my limbs touch the rest of my body that used to irritate me to no end. Now, however, I’m grateful that I still have something left.

There used to be a maid who took care of me. She never did tell me her name, nor did I ever see her face, but I remember the thick black cloak she always wore and her long, wispy hair that hung from under its hood. She made me strawberry tea, my favourite kind, and fed me steak and roast potatoes with a bony hand. It was with those same hands that she gave me my first tattoo, a string of characters on my upper arm, and my second, and third… For as long as she stayed by my side, I got a new tattoo every day, another string of characters I could not recognise scrawled across my arms and legs, leaving behind the faint sting of a sewing needle. I think they’re beautiful, no matter how incomprehensible they are.

It’s dark, stormy and all-around gloomy where I live. The storm clouds have never left and rain has never stopped. As I stare outside my window, I wonder if each house along the street contains another soul like me, a soul trapped in a pile of rotting flesh. I wonder if their limbs feel as heavy as mine, and if they too have been inked with a myriad of old runes. Beyond the weeds and too-tall grass, I wonder if they too are still alive.